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13 October 2010

being unfamiliar with booty call protocal

my clock said 2:35 am.
who the hell was calling me this late? i hope nothing bad happened at home....
me: hello
him: hey!
me: hey, wassup?
him: you sleep?
me: umm yeah...
him: oh i was hoping i could come through
me: i gotta be up in a few cuz the choir is singing early for homecoming
him: oh okay
me: aiight, i'll talk to you tomorrow
i immediately went back to sleep as if that conversation never happened.

the next day, i told my friends about it and they laughed at me. at that point in my life, i had no idea what a booty call was and did not know that i had just botched my first one. the young man in question was a friend of a friend. a guy that i saw in a photo and talked sh*t about what i would do if he was around. then suddenly *POOF* he appeared. that's what a virgin gets for speaking on things that she knows nothing of. when i saw him the next day, he did not avoid me but it was a tad awkward. i spent the remainder of my years in college trying to impress this guy, so that he would want to have sex with me.....AGAIN. i also failed miserably at that. being sexy was definitely not my strong suit either.

after a sexual hiatus and the teachings of a small group of lovely thug friends, i mastered the art of the booty call. the late night phone calls hence forth went like this:
me: 'Sup
him: hey
me: what you doing?
him: on my way
me: aight
fun was had by all during those days and i created my own set of booty call rules.
1. little communication
2. lots of good sex
if there is too much communication, the arrangement will end instantly. if the sex becomes bad, the arrangement will end instantly. all other rules or regulations are to be discussed between the participants of the agreement. my agreement had no extras to start but i had to amend it because of this. i decided after a while that i was better off taking a sex break and i faded into BOLIVIA (c)Mike Tyson until i met a stanking ass Kappa*.

*i will tell that story when i have a ton of time